Would you like some gold with that vote, madam?

They've just been through the state elections here. Forget better roads or communications or transport, this election was truly populist in a way western politicians can only dream of - the two main parties were basing their campaigns on lots of freebies...

• A free television set to every family (state population: 62 million, est cost $250m) for "women's recreation and general knowledge".
• Subsidised rice at two rupees (3p) a kilo to "make women feel happy at heart".
• Free gas stoves and computer training (hmm, high tech-stoves?)
  
• Free electricity (to farmers and weavers).
  
• Two acres of land for the landless rural poor (about 8 million acres!)
• Free bicycles to every student in the state (rich or poor)
• Four grams of gold to every poor woman who gets married.

In the end the DMK won (headed by an ex-film writer) over the AIADMK (headed by an ex-film star).

I'm just glad it's all over. It means I'll be able to find a beer again! For the last week before the elections all the "Wine shops" (total dive state-run off licences: 500 ml bottles for 70p) and hotel bars (the only bars: the same bottles are 2-3 quid) were closed (to prevent violence...right, it very nearly provoked it from me. No amount of bribery could get a beer out of any waiter or bartender)

Kingfisher pretty much rules here, though I reckon it's a poor cousin of the export-quality stuff that gets to the UK. If I can find them, Sandpiper or Golden Eagle are what I prefer. Mmm, cold beer.

1, 2, 3...yup 1.1 billion!

This is sunday afternoon at the beach in Chennai; a week or so ago when it was one of the first really hot days (42 and really humid). The city kind of surrounds this beach, it's very central. It's also huge; ok, longish at about 1.5km but really wide - about 250m of flat sand from the water to the road. The building looming out of the mist is a lighthouse about 1 km away. The crowd is this deep in a strip about 50m wide from the water and all the way down! Elsewhere it thins out a bit and there are stalls and kids rides and food, and lots of picnicking.












Not many people actually swim as the rips are very dangerous all along this coast. The sport here is to do with these guys on horseback - the beach patrol! No Hoff or baywatch babes here. Basically these guys charge (caught in action, above) up and down the beach swinging their lathi (6-8 ft long sticks) at anyone who looks like they might be swimming, or about to. Forget about rescuing anyone, I think they'd actually hit them...if they could reach them from horseback. So as these guys charge their horses up and down the beach, the crowd rushes back from the water and then just closes back behind the horses again (and the swimmers go swimming again :-). To see this many people moving so fluidly was truly amazing. It reminded me of nature doco's like Blue Planet, when the tuna rips into a huge school of anchovie, which breaks up and reforms again.

The, when I left the beach I saw a similar thing happen with the auto's (the 3 wheeled taxis). Hundreds were lined up to take this crowd away, but it wasn't an authorised stopping zone. I was having problems getting the price I wanted when one single cop on a motorbike turned up...well, it was like watching a massive Le Mans start, drivers diving into their cabs, starting them and hurtling away in a swarm, resettling on the kerb a hundred meters or so down. Fresh ones were coming in behind the cop and settling where the others had taken off.. It was great for me, nervous cabbies, looking over their shoulders for cops, make poor negotiators.

Power cuts

We get a few around here, perhaps a good two hour one each week, or a couple of smaller ones. With the heat climbing here (it's been 42 quite regularly in the last couple of weeks) the aircons are on longer and a few of the old soviet-era powerstations miss a beat or two.

My flatmate goes to a gym 'round the corner and won't run on the running machines, just in case there's a cut - he's seen what happens when the cut hits - they stop pretty much dead, but the runner shoots forward of course, but only so far - the control unit stops 'em pretty quick :-) Ouch.

Escape to Mamallapuram

A couple of weekends ago I took off down the coast a couple of hours, to the village of Mamallapuram. Famous for it's ancient, big-scale, rock-carvings, it still has a very active stone-carving community, though now mainly for things that tourists can take home with them. It's main attaction for me though was that it had some air that could be breathed without a mask.
I checked into a great little hotel just back from the beach. 300 Rupees a night (4 quid) No a/c, but it did have lots of fans and a gorgeous terrace with an extra double bed under mosquito netting.
I was determined to sleep outside, but actually got beaten back inside by the nighttime heat. The standalone fan could only ever cool one side of me, the other got broiled in the thick hot air! Roof fans rock.

The beach looks great, but like this whole coast it has very dangerous rips. There weren't many takers, and I wasn't going to chance it either, especially not when I got up early one morning and saw the fishermen doing what they have to do before going out in their boats (you can see them in this pic! with the "shore" temple behind them)

There are several good seafood restaurants right on the beach (I hope they catch their fish a LONG way out...). The routine was basically: Up early, walk the beach, nap, breakfast, nap, massage, nap, lunch, nap, read, nap, check out the carvings, nap...you get the picture.

The massage was interesting - Ayurvedic, which I am guessing means "very oily"...naked and battered with an oiled mallet thing ("panchen"). Sounds bad, it was actually pretty good. Very weirdly the guy asked if I wanted the oil, er, down there. I didn't fancy the panchen treatment down at all, as you can imagine, so skipped that.

Check out the pre-and post-tsunami fishing boats below. No, the wooden one isn't damaged, that's the old style - open-backed. They then bolt a motor to that back end (closest the camera) and they're off. The new ones were mainly donated and the feeling is that they are not as sea-worthy! The carvings are incredible, the elephant here is life-sized.

Heavenly support

Each morning at work there is a 30 minute "devotional", from 9 to 9.30 , consisting of bible lessons, prayer and singing (in English and Tamil). Perhaps once a week I'll sit in on these - more to show my face than anything. While they all pray, I might try and meditate, and I'll join in the "singing" (I make noise anyway) - I'm encouraged in that by the fact that some of them have less tone than me!

I sometimes get included in the prayers too; "...and lord, look after Andrew, lord, keep him safe from the heat", and "Lord, we ask that the eMerge project [the software I am installing] goes well and is delivered without problems.". It seems to work, at least the heat one, it's been very hot, about 42 recently, but I've seldom been too uncomfortable in it...not at work anyway, though often when stuck in traffic, or if walking to and from the train.

Cheeky monkey

Caught this guy in our big meeting area the other day. Just before this pic he was sitting up on the wall next to the white board (top right), playing with a pen. It looked like he's just written all the stuff on the board. I guess type-writers and shakespeare are a bit old-hat for your modern IT monkey.

A day prior to this, one of them had walked in the front door of the building, straight through to the kitchen at the back, taken the sugar jar and scampered back out. He was seen by the receptionist just as he nipped out the door!

What'd you say?

The organisation here is called IMED, you can see what that stands for in one of the pics in the "It's a zoo out here" entry, below. Behind the monkey. A very christian organisation, protestant - I am strongly discouraged from mentioning drinking & smoking and certainly not anything more hard-core than that. Swearing is also frowned on, but you can't work with computers and not swear, so I am introducing them to this concept (frequently) and while they did tend to look down at their feet and shuffle a bit at the beginning, they now seem to be getting used to it.

I have a Romanian colleague working here with me who arrived complete with a big sticker on the top of his laptop saying "Albaniasex.org", in big bold white text on a red background. Unmissable. The IT boys saw it and were completely goggle-eyed. However, It's not actually a sex site - just albania's equivalent of jobserve (i.e. a job-hunting site), it's just that they weren't getting any hits with their original name...

It's a zoo out here

Where I work is to the south of the city, in an area called Little Mount. It's quite a christian area - St Thomas ("doubting Thomas") lived here for many years (though he wasn't sure) and there is a big church here, built over the cave he sheltered in when being hunted occasionally by irate Hindu's. It's quite a residential area...the head office of the bank here looks more like a house. Or perhaps a zoo...these guys seem to spend a lot of time picking nits on the roof our motorcycle shed and generally looking very content.
You can get very close to them, a meter or so, but they have very sharp teeth and I don't have my rabies injections yet...The baby (below) is very ugly, but very cute at the same time :-)

Computer geeks

There are only 2 sorts of handbills posted around this town - undecipherable ones (by me, anyway) in Tamil script, and all the others - advertising computer programming schools, courses and jobs. Java seems to be the main tech wanted. On the plane here, the nice little 50 (maybe 60) year old lady across the isle turned out to be a C++ programmer...not quite the same demographic as in London, I think.

Chennai has the reputation of being the second IT city in India, after Bangalore. Mainly BPO's (business process outsourcer), meaning both call-centres and businesses that do actual processes. For example, I've heard that some hospitals in the states electronically ship their doctors written patient notes to a BPO here where they have typists and data-entry people who stick it all into the hospitals computer system so that it's there for the doctors when they come in for work the next day...

A billboard forest

I've never seen such rampart bill-boarding as I have here, and not little ones either, these are HUGE, some are 2 or 3 stories high, and everywhere thoughout the city. The seem to be mainly for sari and jewellry shops, and our CFO reckons they are mainly used as a way for those businesses (or their owners) to launder money, either for themselves or on behalf of others.

An arranged marriage

I have a flatmate - Biju. He's O.I. as well - actually working as the project manager for my project. He's also a yank - His family is Indian, from Kerala state (to the west) and he grew up in Philadelpia.

When not actively trying to be somewhere the other isn't, we have to spend a serious amount of time around each other; sharing the flat, travelling to work most days, and then working together in the same room, with close co-operation, each day. Thank god, we get on well...so far ;-)

Living

This is the apartment where the bank has put me up. It's in the Nungambakkum area (Stirling First Cross St), which is a quiet and leafy street away from the chaos of the roads.

It's the 3rd floor , our lounge has the unobscured bay windows you can see here. It's damn hot in that apartment, The flat roof above gets baked all day. Without the aircon I imagine it's a bit like the chicken feels in the Tandoori oven. Chennai has a lot of sea wind, luckily, which cools the heavy humid air so it's tolerable. 2 of the 3 aircons failed last week and the repair man was away in Bangalor, I was close to relocating to a hotel, it was too hot to sleep well. Putting the fan on full speed is not calming - I get buffetted about as the ceiling is quite low!

The shots below are looking down the road, and inside the lounge.

New project - India!

So much for being OI's Eastern Europe regional director, here I am in Chennai, India on a project...well, at least the "East" bit was right.

I've been here 3 weeks so far, but it seems like 3 months :-( The main reason is the volume of traffic and the waves of noise that wash over you - ringing two-stroke exhausts, horns being beeped - it's just so tiring. The mornings can be bad, though at least that is done in daylight, but the evening trip home...when you can see the smog in the headlights, ugh. And the auto's (above) are open, right? and murphy's law says they will always pull up alongside the big whale of a bus, just so that the 4" exhaust is pointing right into the back of the auto. Unerring.

Ok, so there's lots of vehicles on the roads, but that least that also equates to a lot of people being moved about too. Not like one-person-per-car in the UK. 4 on a bike is not uncommon - nor 5. The most I've seen is six. After that they'd have to get fancy and do an inverted pyramid or something :-)

Safer at work...

Wow, long day at work...I got a cab home, eventually (about 10pm) … As usual I was out on the road, waving at it while it was still about 200m away and, as usual, the driver didn’t see me until the last minute (although he was the only car on this very straight road, and I was the only person, waving furiously. And not even the only person, the only tall white person on the road…) There was a screeching of metal-on-metal as the bits where there used to be brake pads hit the bits that used to like being pressed up against brake pads.

It was a very beaten up on Diahatsu Tico – there are quite a few of them about. As seems to be the rule for taxis, the windscreen looked like a rhino had been dropped on it, every panel was dented and you could have passed an average-sized paperback though the gap between the door frame and the car when the door was “closed”. It pulled up and I stooped to ask the driver if he knew where the Royal Park hotel was and start the bargaining process for the fare. I was aghast…the driver was so cross-eyed that, by comparison, Clarence the cross-eyed lion had 20-20 vision. Still, he was a cab, there weren’t many about, so I jumped in. The Diahatsu Tico is an exceptionally small car. The driver and I ended being very close. We found that he couldn’t really get it in 4^th or 5^th gear at all, with me and my bag there. There was just nowhere to get my legs out the way. It wasn't helping matters that the seat had been impacted from the rear or the side somehow and had a twist on it that left me practically facing the driver. Not only that but the structural metal brace above my head and the windscreen had a nice round indent in it where, I presumed, a previous passenger had been thrown up into it.

However, with lots of tooting (to variously tell others to get out of the way, say “here I come”, just say hello to someone he knew or due to a nervous twitch) we got home fine.

Tue 14th June - Random observations

• I’ve never come across so many stutterers. I work with two who have it strongly I have met at least 3 or 4 other people who stutter.
• At least 75% of all cars on the road are taxis.
• The cars here are beyond decrepit, I have been in taxis where the back doors are held on by one hinge, where the indicators switch is broken and has been replaced by the rocker-switch that used to the fan speed, where every window in the vehicle has a major impact crack on it – but which are all still used … replete with current warrant and insurance! Additionally, it appears all suspension is removed when a car is imported.
• Nothing is ever fixed or maintained here, just run into the ground. Cars, buildings, you name it. In the main bank branch, with about 30 people working in it, there is 1 loo that works, out of 5. I reduced it from 2 working loos to 1 today by breaking off the metal flush lever. Unfortunately it fell straight into the bowl…before I’d flushed a No.2 away.
• Toilet paper – the worst I have ever come across. No strength at all. Seems the same everywhere I’ve been. Even if you fold the two-ply 3 or 4 times your finger will still go through (depending on Technique of course). Best toilet paper I’ve come across? On a Swiss train: 3 ply, quilted, must have been aloe-vera soaked too.

Sat/Sun 11th/12th - It came from outer space

Sorry, lots of text here, but it is two days! J

The plan - Work till 5, then head out to Lake Bosumtwe (a meteorite impact crater and the largest body of swimmable fresh-water in Ghana). The “Tro-Tro” station is just across from work, so at about 2 I scoped out where the departure zone was. It is chaos in that station - hundreds of vans, not enough room, traders, passengers. Chickens. Madness. There is no central office that I found, though was told it existed, so I asked lots of people where the van left from. I was gradually circling closer, by the 5^th person I got there. 2500 Cedi for an hours journey (about 15p), no problem. "Would there be a departure at about 5?" Sure, no problem, they said.

The reality - At 5, I came back to the same spot – nothing. No-one there. “No tro-tro this late.” Arrgh. I was in luck though, there was a second station about 10 mins walk away. Luckily a van was filling up just as I got there, so I injected myself into it. An interesting ride…about 10 mins into it there started to be raised voices amongst the other passengers. Gaining in angry-ness quickly, the object of their ire was the girl sitting next to me but one (two tiny kids, one on the knee of the other, between us). Suddenly the guy directly in front of me starting hitting the girl. Everyone else seemed to be on his side too…and for her part the girl was very angry (at the world generally from what I could make out) and super-gobby. Something she’d said had started it all and she just would not shut up for about 30 mins. Eventually she got off and everyone clapped. No-one would tell me what it was about.

Have I arrived? - There was a short taxi ride from Kuntanse, which was the destination of the tro-tro, down to Abonu by the lake. A huge thunderstorm and washed out roads prevented the driver from taking me straight to my hotel, but his English wasn’t good enough to convey that. To my mind he was throwing me out in Abonu, which had no streetlights, in the middle of a huge lightning storm. I wasn’t keen and was very uncertain what was going on. Eventually I got the idea that the hotel wasn’t far and that someone would take me. A crowd of men and boys materialized, all offering the same service. I was very uncertain. Eventually an older man got a torch (the only time you could see anything was when the lightning came) and just told me to follow him. Some other lads were saying to go with them in another direction but the older guy suggested it was a trick (!) Followed torch-guy down to the lake front, the sky was being rent by lightning, though it wasn’t raining just then. We waded though a flood of rainwater that covered the path, over rickety wooden bridges, through mud, around a swamp, every now and again getting a clear picture from the lightning. Boy was I glad to check in!

I was the only guest at the whole hotel! (about 25 roooms)

Early bird - Woke up to the view of the lake at 5.30 Sunday morning. I actually wanted to be up this early to go for walk before the sun rose. It was a bit difficult to tell, since it was so cloudy still, but it was light enough to walk around the lake by the one dirt road that circumnavigates it. I passed through 3 villages before turning back. Very squalid, all of them. People were just getting up, sheets still wrapped around them. They have power, but no lights it seems. Mud huts. Communal outdoors loos. Scabby dogs, chickens everywhere. Kids everywhere! Asking for toffee...I didin’t have any but did have to hand over some cash for some photos.

Big - The lake is HUGE, it must have been whopper of a meteorite. It's about 2 km across and the crater rim, now deeply forested hills, rise about 200m above lake level, right around it. Had a swim after the walk – the temp was about that of my blood! I could hardly tell I was in water. No Bilharzia apparently…guess I’ll find out soon enough...

That's a boat? - The fishermen have lots of nets set up, they get around on these “boats” which are basically a long, thick plank. The only concession to hydro-dynamics is a slight chamfer at each end on the bottom surface. These things are not even at the dug-out stage…incredible. I tried one out for 30 mins or so and they are a nightmare to steer and not very stable. It does make you wonder, why hasn’t this design moved on over thousands of years? Oh, they paddle by using their hands…

And...Relax - After the walk, the swim, the lingering breakfast overlooking the lake, the paddle, the swim, the lunch; I have to say I’ve seldom felt so relaxed. And I needed it, it’s been so hectic at work, and Kumasi itself is to hectic what the QE II is to that log I paddled.

Fri 10th June - They've got be cheap somewhere!

I thought I’d struck gold today too, with Mach 3 razor blades. Now, we all know that replacement Mach 3 shaving heads are, by weight, the most expensive material on earth. They are good, but they are expensive. I can’t remember exactly but I think it’s about 6 quid or more for a pack of 4 of these things (and the pack weights NOTHING). I found, in a chemist here, a pack of 4 (exactly the same size as the pack of 4 in the UK) for 50,000 Cedi – 3 quid! I was so excited. I told them that if any more stock came in (this was the last pack) then I’d buy it all and take it back to the UK and flog them there. I got it home, ripped it open … and found there were only 2! The other 2 slots where there should have been blades were blanked off! So, that means these things are just as expensive here as in the UK. It was the same story in Serbia. Somehow Gillette have managed to charge the same absolute value in every country in the world!

Thu 9th June - Find Yoda here you will not. Hmm?

Had a very strange thought today, not entirely complimentary to some Ghanains, but speaking with people at work often reminds of me of something, especially when they get really animated. I finally figured out it reminded me of speaking to someone who is a cross between Yoda and Jah-Jah-binks. Sorry, perhaps not that complimentary, but I can’t shake that thought now I’ve had it. It’s the rising, and slightly guttural, “Hmm?” a lot of people do here at the end of a sentence; very Yoda-like. Plus the Ghan-english mish-mash they often use and the clicking and squeaking noises made when in full flight of an arm-waving conversation. My apologies to all of Ghana, but blame has to fall at the feet of Speilberg.

Huge thunderstorms this evening. Whenever it rains the power goes out in this part of town. This means the hotel generator is on. It’s right outside my room (though one floor down). I can hear it thrumping away happily. Not so happy for me, usually but the rain is so heavy that the rain is the primary noise. I can sleep to the sound of rain ok, who can’t? Unfortuately it abates before I get to sleep, so I am left with the generator. I suppose that even that is better than the piteously whining hotel security dog that’s kept me up for the last few nights. I guess it keeps away burglars by appealing to sense of care for an unhappy animal, or more like likely if they keep the guests awake a burglar isn’t going to get far in robbing the rooms!

Tue 7th June - "Us v Them"

Religion: The country is both Christian and Muslim (I get the feeling there are no other real options). Both religions seem to get on well too. Muslims are the minority, and most Christians I have spoken to certainly more than tolerate the Muslims, everyone seems to get on ok, but, as with all minorities, there is a feeling that the Muslims “stick together” too much. There are certain parts of any town, for instance that is a Muslim “ghetto”. Perhaps this is reversed in the north , which is predominantly Muslim. Several people I’ve spoken to here actually seemed to have backed Pres Bush for his “stance on Muslims”, notably the “war on terror”. There is no “terror” to war against (in the religious sense) in this country and yet it this idea still seems to resonate with some here. Strange.

Names of people and things are also entwined with religion: the “The Lord Protects Chop bar” (a “Chop bar” is kind of street restaurant), “God is Great hair boutique”, “What a mighty god, Plywood and Art shop”. I even met a guy today who introduced himself as “Do the right thing”, no kidding, though most guys seem to be called Samuel.

Another Tro-Tro moniker: Saw one today that said “God is God” on the wind-screen tinted bit at the top and “Blood of Jesus!” in huge print on the bonnet.

Mon 6th June - Don't cross the streams!

Apparently the Malaria pills (Doxycycline) make you a bit constipated, feels like it.

Bloody Hell! I’ve just read the chapter on Bilharzia in my travel guide…If that was all you read about Africa you’d never come here. Basically, when someone with this disease craps into fresh water, the eggs hatch and find their way to the nearest pond snail where they develop and then emerge as a tiny torpedo-shaped thing called cercariae, which, when it lands on you (it floats in the air) it digests its way though your skin! So, you can come into contact with this thing if you are in infested water or, if you are really unlucky, even being within a couple of hundred metres infested water since they are carried on the wind. These things live for about 30 hours after hatching, and get less vigorous (less able to digest their way into you, ugh) as they get older and are pumped into the air in their greatest numbers between 11am and 3pm… Get those morning or late evening wades in! My flatmate, Dan, had a bout of this – I’ll have to check the loo in my house for pond snails when I am back.

Sun 5th June - The Big Game

Antony got me up early to go for breakfast – a local delicacy of rice balls, fish & beans. Not bad, but I am a bit fed up with rice, what with living in a Chinese restaurant ‘n all. The beer was the best bit, this time one called Gulda, halfway between a Guinness and a lager. Sunday morning, 9.30am, first beer of the day…These people are religious, but not certainly not puritans.

I went and worked a bit then Antony picked me up again for the game. We had paid 100,000 cedi (6 quid) for VIP seats but we’d got there too late and all the best seats were gone. We were left with seats on the lowest level of the VIP area, essentially about a metre above ground-level, with views obstructed by barbed wire, concrete walls, the squad shelters, pointy fences…and women balancing large trays of plantain chips or watermelon slices on their heads J But, for all that, we could still see and it turned out to be a brilliant match: The Burkina-Faso “Stallions” went one up in the first half, then a penalty to the Black Stars (Ghana) brought them level in the second. Finally a great goal gave Ghana the lead. Pandemonium!

When the final whistle went there was first a pitch invasion by the fans, then by the police. But the police just wanted to clear some space for the real VIPs to do some speechifying. I’m not sure that the crowd understood that because they legged it back over these really spikey fences into the stands. I’ve mentioned that the Ghanaians aren’t very tall. Well, the exception is Ghanaian policemen, who could form a very good basketball team. I’d run from them, for sure, tall black guys in severe black paramilitary-style uniforms, armed with long black truncheons (ahem). Running would seem like a good bet.

Strange co-incidence: The Ghanaian coach is a Serbian…this was his first game. In the first half he had put on all the overseas-based players, and they didn’t really look like a team. For the second, he mixed up the local-based and internationals and there was much more cohesion, and two goals. The guys in the crowd near me, who looked like they were having a very big argument, were actually all agreeing with one-another that the internationals get paid too much and so have nothing to play for when with their country.

Anthony then took me out for a few Guinness’s. For some reason they LOVE Guinness here, though it’s actually the stout (at a healthy 7.5%). It’s absolutely everywhere. We met up with some of his friends and went for more booze at another place, the Timber Gardens (because it appears to be situated amongst some timber yards, on the city outskirts. I wanted to try some of the local firewater, something called Akpetesie, made from Palm wine. I couldn’t get it but I did get the palm wine, also quite strong, and smooth (and red) but my lasting association is more Palmolive than Palm wine. Horrible soapy taste.

Saturday 4th June - Run Forest! Run!

Got up at 7.30 and went for a run! Wow, the humidity just saps the energy right out of you. My hotel is on a busy main road with some small roads off either side, tried a couple but ended up running through some villages, or perhaps a better word is “slums”. I didn’t really feel comfortable… (a) I stand out like a sort thumb and (b) I am wearing (relatively) expensive trainers – most western shoes here are second hand. I have not yet seen a new-shoe shop. Not that I think someone is going to take them off me, though I was getting lots of admiring stares (and not at my running style), but more that I didn’t want to “flaunt” my relative wealth. Eventually found some quieter roads.

Went to the “Cultural Centre” in the centre. Quite cool, basically a museum and craftshop. Didn’t buy anything in the craft shop but there are some very good carvings, people, animals etc. The museum was great, small, with an excellent guided tour, mainly a history of the Ashanti kings. These guys are “enstooled” rather than enthroned. They have a golden stool for the coronation of the king – solid gold – supposedly it originally fell from the sky. Had a great rambling political chat with the guide – Another Ghanain who likes Pres. Bush! …because he stands up to terrorism! Tried to disavow him of that notion, almost got him to see who might be the bigger terrorist…

Went to the market for food, passing through the main bus station, “tro-tro’s” (vans) actually. Loaded up the gunnels with goods and people, they don’t leave till they are full. No schedule. Crazy place, sooo busy with vans and people. Even Cairo wasn’t this full on. Each tro-tro has it moniker on the front of it somewhere. There was one that was so beaten up, and so loaded down, that it’s name echo’d my thought: “Jesus!”

Went from there to the market, for some quick food, before going back to work for a bit. I wanted to take some pics of the waves humanity crashing out of the market area but these people don’t like photos being taken of them much. You have to be discreet, but how do you do that with so many people around you and you stand out like I do?

Fri June 3 - Marriage proposal

OK, I was mislead - they are not vultures circling the bank... one came close enough to see the neck is too short – some sort of eagle-like thing, big. Lots of them too.

I made it to devotional at the bank this morning, dragged myself out for 8am. It’s basically singing and praying, led by one rotored staff member each day. Quite evangelical, the singing was great! Impromptu accapella’s all over the shop, interspersed with really fervent praying.

One of the guys took me around the town in the middle of the day to try to find a spare battery for my p800 phone. Pretty rare, the battery that is, not cellphone shops – there are hundreds of them. It was incredibly unpleasant, no so much the heaving throngs of people, but the heat and humidity. Samuel had sweat rolling down his face, and like so many people here, carried a hanky to dab it all away, so I reckon I was doing pretty well just to be alive.

Victor, one of the two gatekeepers at the head office – very empire british in his demeanor, loose tan-uniform, upright, always very crisp in his salutes to me, “sah!”. Well, Victor offered me his daughters hand in marriage. He said he liked my “structure” (outlining my shape with his hands) and my smile, so I would do. I was flattered, of course, but felt I had to decline. I didn’t seem to be able to get away with not meeting said daughter, so I have a date for 4 o’clock tomorrow afternoon – with no idea what she is like, age, or anything! Though Victor did give me permission to “do what you like, I’m only the father”…

It’s Friday night, so thought I’d better go out. Looked in the guide book, settled on Ryans Irish pub, just down the road. No, luck, closed. The guide book is from 2001 (thanks, Dan ;-) Ended up at Vic Bamboo’s café near the centre. I had an expectation of a bustling place, esp. on a Friday. Uh-uh, very quiet. Huge menu with everything from Italian, to Indian, to Chinese. I had the butter chicken, which wouldn’t be recognized as such in Brick Lane, but was quite edible. That, plus a small beer, small water and Gordons Spark (G&T in a bottle) was 80,000 Cedi, or 5 quid. Chatted to a young American woman, who was working for an NGO and living in a small village to the west for a few months…all credit to her. No running water and even less electricity that we have but she appeared to be loving it.

The Black Stars are staying in my hotel tonight – that’s the Ghanain national football team. They play Burkino-Faso on Sunday. To which Antony, at work, got me and him some VIP tickets. I might get religious just for a moment…I hope to God that there is some shade in that stadium!

Day 5 - Fee, fi, fo, fum...

Vultures…there are vultures circling above the bank! No carcases that I can see but I guess there is a good thermal up there for some reason. Maybe the heat from our servers?

Huge generalization coming up…things are really big here!; (well, generalizations for a start ;-), the lizards (which are everywhere and are the equivalent of london pidgeons but much, much nicer), I think the biggest I have seen so far (right beside my table at the café) was about 25cm long from head to start of tail and another 20 cm for the tail itself, leaves – there are leaves on the trees here I that I could wrap around me like a cape, beer - nice big 650ml bottles, those suitcases at the airport, not to mention pot-holes J, smiles!

Day 4 - The lebanese

My walk to work is along a busy main road and it only takes about 10 mins. You have to do it slowly or the humidity gets you sweating loads. The road is festooned with stalls selling, in order commonness; Phone cards & Phone calls, Machete’s, cold drinks and food/fruit.

The phone call sellers are funny, there is a phone wire coming right up out of the dirt beside the tarmac, connected to a phone that is generally perched on top of a couple of stacked crates. All this protected by a big umbrella. It costs about 2000 cedi/min to make a local call from that phone. That’s about 10p/min. This must be for the really poor because most people seem to have mobiles, Mobiles are incredibly popular and there are dozens of shops selling all the paraphernalia you can imagine.

The machete sellers worry me make me think. No doubt these are just used for ground clearance, but you can’t help but recall the footage from Rwanda, and other places, where it wasn’t ground that was being cleared. Saw a kid in school uniform waling with a machete – that would have made the teachers a bit nervous at my school.

Another awesome lunch with the staff today: a selection of chicken leg or fried spicy whole fish (or both) with plantain again (soft this time though, much nicer, sweeter. Closer to being a real banana) and some very tasty sauces with chickpeas and chilli powder, and rice. All this, a large plate, cost me 7000 cedi, or about 40p.

Strangely, though everyone I’ve met at the bank is very friendly, no-one has invited me out anywhere. I am going to a football match on Sunday, but had to suggest it to the guy I am working closest with. He’s cool, and is getting it all organized now, but I had to make the suggestion. It’s a big match! A world-cup qualifier between Ghana v Burkina-Faso…

I was told this morning by the IT manager that 9am isn’t an appropriate time to turn up to work (that’s my default getting to work time). This is because “devotional” is held at 8. “Devotional?” I asked? Then clicked, yes, this is a very religious country, christian and muslim, and a Christian organization. In Serbia they had quiety dropped the religious angle from working at the bank, but here, no way, it’s still integral. I told him that I’d try and come once a week, on a Monday, say, just to show some respect (Tony would love me!). I won’t do more than that, especially I am going to be working till late in the evenings to get this project done. Mind you, it might help! I refrained from telling him I am atheist, I’m not sure how that would go down…

Found a Lebanese restaurant just down the road from my hotel, past a busy strip of stalls, shops, and hawkers. And there were indeed Lebanese-looking people in there!

In fact, slightly off-puttingly, there was the largest Lebanese (or any other nationality) guy I have seen since being in Denver last year. It was pretty gross, made grosser by comparison with every local I have seen so far, none of whom are fat (some are chubby, I’ll grant) and a lot of whom are positively stick-like. I estimated that he could have fitted one local down each trouser leg (assuming his legs were no longer in them). More comically, he very strongly resembled a Lebanese Marlon Brando, you know, with a kind of concave face. He did actually go ahead and order a huge amount from the menu (I was well within eavesdropping range).